I began this blog, perhaps like others, as a way of dealing with my powerful reaction to Bush's reelection. This included my discouragement, considering how much more damage he can do in an additional four years; my disappointment with all those misguided good folks who actually voted for him and my embarrassment at being part of an America that would elect George Bush twice despite the fact that he is sending the country down the toilet.
I was a pretty radical activist for social causes in the 70's and 80's. I guess I burned out over inadequate results considering the level of commitment and effort I sustained. Although my direct activism ended, my political sensibilities remained as acute. The cliche about how youth give of themselves and older people give money sort of fits. But now no amount I would give can salve the burning I feel when I think about the situation and what we are in for. That 70's and 80's part of me wants to get out into the streets again and take them on. Another, stronger part, to my shame, says no. Older people than I manage to take action. The resulting feeling of impotence is difficult to tolerate.
I have never kept a journal. Over the years, I have had a few commentary pieces published in newspapers and magazines but for every one of those there were many, many more that I wanted to write but did not. I have always believed that I had something worthwhile to add to the public conversation but self-doubt usually sabotaged that impulse. I have literally struggled with the "to write/not to write" issue for decades. As I am writing this now the struggle continues, albeit with a desirable outcome today. The question is will I be able to sustain it?
Taking these first steps feels very good and satisfying.
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